Masturbation Monday: Two Cucumbers


This erotica short is an entry to the weekly Masturbation Monday challenge, hosted by author Kayla Lords! The rules are simple: write something nasty that makes people want to masturbate. If you liked to read it, “like” this post! 🙂

It’s just past 11:30pm at the Sunshine Organic Market. Callie rolls down the aisles of cereals, potato chips, canned fruit, and pasta sauce with a full cart. She restocks each item, then carefully records her work on a clipboard with a pink pen. A radio played over the loudspeakers plays disco music, filling the silence of the Market with violin and high-vocals. Callie works alone; the store isn’t big enough to justify more night time employees.

Callie doesn’t mind the quiet. She’s back home for summer in between college semesters, and the slow-pace of the Sunshine Organic Market suits her. Her dorm is a cacophony of chatter, shouting, and music. She would often fall asleep to the sound of mattresses squeaking as couples on all sides of her room fucked and moaned. When the semester ended, she had her first peaceful night of sleep back at home.

She restocks cans of black beans now, one silver can at a time. Her phone buzzes in her pocket, cutting into a daydream. Callie pulls it out and looks at the screen. Sam. He was a dark, curly-haired musician who had fucked her after a Halloween party. Cute, but not a good lay. He pestered her sometimes for nudes, sometimes for sexting. She’s intrigued.

Unlocking her screen, she opens the text. It’s a gorgeous picture of Sam’s cock, taken from a low angle which makes his dick look enormous. Do you want some of this, baby? He has also sent a small emoji of an eggplant; redundant but cute.

Callie hadn’t been fucked since she came back for the summer. It also felt too weird to masturbate at home, especially since her vibrator sounded like a leaf blower. She can already feel honey build between her legs thinking about Sam’s thick cock. She loved the way his long hair got into everything when they fucked; tickling her mouth, her eyes, her cheeks.

She replies with a selfie of her restocking the shelves, looking serious. I’m at work, she writes.

No one’s there, right? Send me something.

Callie rolls her eyes and looks around the aisle. There has to be something fun she could use for her wicked needs. Produce comes to mind. She heads in that direction, using this time to imagine Sam naked.

Carrots, cucumbers, squash, and corn. So many things she could fuck herself with. Callie picks two long, thick cucumbers for the job. They feel cool in her hand and weighty, like two green cocks. She sits down on the linoleum beside the pile of produce, hidden from the windows and the security camera’s view. She takes a picture of the two cucumbers and sends it to Sam. About to play with these, she writes, knowing it will drive him crazy.

She wiggles off her khaki shorts, then her white lace panties. Using them as a pad for her ass, she sits down on the pile and spreads her legs wide. Callie tests how wet she is (very!) with her hand, rubbing it over her pink bud while the other hand pinches her nipple through her bra.

Half of the work of masturbation lies in imagination. She imagines Sam crawling to her on the grocery store floor, crouching down as low as a snake to eat her pussy. She can almost hear his deep voice growl as he eats her, sucking on the clit and fingering the hole. This in mind, she rubs the cool surface of the cucumber on her pussy until it becomes slick with juice.

Once the veggie is wet, she dips it into her pussy and fucks herself with a long, slow pace. It feels wonderful in her tight cunt, almost ice cold. She snaps a picture of the cucumber deep inside of her with the caption: wish it was your cock, then sends it to Sam.

Callie picks up the pace, fucking herself harder and faster. She lifts the second cucumber to her mouth and spits on it, rubbing saliva all around the tip. Now, she lays down on the floor completely and gets ready to insert Cucumber #2. She teases the outside of her tight asshole and imagines that Sam has brought a friend over to join in. Two boys, two cocks, the Devil’s Threesome.

She goes much slower with Cucumber #2, pressing it into her ass gently while she holds the other cucumber still inside of her. The pressure is intense, but pleasing. She relaxes her muscles and takes it like a good little grocer, imagining Sam and an unknown friend filling her from both angles.

With both cucumbers tucked inside of her, she takes a quick picture and sends it to Sam without comment. Now, she works. She fucks her pussy and ass with alternating movements, careful not to go too fast. She can feel her cunt relaxing and tightening over the cucumbers, close to explode. She moans as she works each green cock, pushing and pulling with exactly the speed she loves best.

Callie reaches the edge and then falls off it. She stifles a scream and cums on the cucumbers, throbbing and shaking while both press against each other in her ass and cunt. After she’s finished, she feels hollow and strange. It takes her a moment to regain brain function and slowly pull the vegetables out; first her ass, then her cunt.

I came, she sends to Sam. She stands up, pulls her panties and shorts back on, and decides to throw the cucumbers away.